There's no better send-up of food television than Posh Nosh, the BBC's hilarious cooking show parody. In their quest to "bring extraordinary food to ordinary people," our hosts, the Honorable Simon and Minty Marchmont (played by Richard E. Grant and Arabella Weir), welcome us into their kitchen, where instruction is a mixture of cheerful snobbery and tortured linguistics. In Episode 3 (embedded below), Minty offers, "We make our own stock, but by all means buy stock cubes if you have low self-esteem." According to the Marchmonts, you must "alienate the chorizo," "interrogate the mussels," and "blade-run your knife under the fish's skin until it's thoroughly ashamed." We'll never look at cooking in quite the same way again.