To the emoji-making masters at Unicode Consortium,
The avocado, takeout box, dumpling, croissant emojis—love ’em. The baguette and cucumber? Can’t wait to make them our new eggplant. The thing you’re calling “Shallow Pan of Food”? Honestly we can’t really tell what that is, but it looks like a curry, which we’re into.
But a “Modern Pentathlon,” really? That’s one of the graphics under consideration, but not chicken wings? Not chips and salsa? Not even a slice of pie?
Here is your mission statement from your website: “[To] enable people around the world to use computers in any language…[and] to educate and engage academic and scientific communities, and the general public.” And we’re grateful for all that you do. But it’s no secret that your international pictorial language comes up far too short in the food department. What are we supposed to say to our non-English-speaking friends, “Easy as [shallow pan of food]?”
Perhaps we, as self-proclaimed food obsessives who relish fragrant Indian fish curry and mozzarella sticks in the same meal, are biased. But we expect more from you. To that end, please consider this the official SAVEUR request for additional food-based emoji to add to your list:
- Garlic Bread (cradled by this man’s hands)
- Cassoulet that takes three days to make
- Mom’s banana bread
- Schweineschmorbraten mit rübengemüse
- West African peanut stew (a.k.a. slurpable peanut butter)
- This white asparagus that is totally the new eggplant
- Grandma Potter’s peach cobbler (no relation to Harry)
- And a little something called gobble gobble balls
But if that’s too much, we’ll even narrow it down. Pie. Pie is really all we’re asking for by 2017. After all, how else are we supposed to text our friends about the return of Twin Peaks without a piece of pie for Dale Cooper?